18. Joy

Ever feel like you are not as happy as you “should” be?  

In this episode you will learn:

  • What joy actually is
  • Why the way you are feeling is the perfect way to feel
  • The Mr. Pibb Parable

Don’t miss this episode to really deepen the joy you experience on your mission and in your daily life.

0:00 Hey, what’s up everybody? It’s Jennie, the LDS mission coach and you are listening to the LDS mission Podcast, episode number eight team joy. I’m Jennie, the LDS mission coach. And whether you are preparing to serve a mission, currently serving a returned missionary or a missionary mama like me, I created this podcast just for you. Are you searching for epic confidence? Ready to love yourself and to learn the how of doing hard things? Then let’s go. I will help you step powerfully into your potential and never question your purpose. Again. It’s time to embrace yourself. Embrace your mission, embrace your life, and embrace what’s next. Hello, everyone, and welcome to the podcast. I’m so excited to be with you today. And I know that I say that every week. But it’s so fun to hang out with you and give you guys helpful tools, tips and strategies to prepare for your mission to use while you’re on your mission and tools and strategies to help you thrive after your mission when you come home. That’s what I’m all about. I want to give you mental and emotional tools so that you can completely succeed so that you can step into your potential so that you can create epic confidence and never question your purpose. Again, far too often I’ve heard returned, missionaries say I just don’t feel like I have a purpose anymore. And I’m here to help. Now. What we’re talking about today is joy. And I want to share with you some of my thoughts that I have about joy. I always see missionaries posting maybe the most quoted Scripture that missionaries love to post about. And it’s men are that they might have joy. And it’s two Nephi 225. And I’ve gotten into more of this scripture and one of my previous episodes, I think it was in the power of an episode so you can totally go check that out. But in that episode, I focus more on the atom fel part of the Scripture. And that all kind of plays into this concept that I want to share with you today. But today we’re going to focus more on joy and what I think joy is an a really fun and exciting and empowering way to think about joy. Sometimes missionaries ask how do you feel joy? And then on another post, what are some of the ways that you feel joy? How did you feel joy today? So the first thing I want to do is I want to share a story with you about when my family went to Disney World This last year we flew to Orlando with my kids minus my son who was on his mission so that kind of was too bad that he wasn’t with us but we were with my oldest son and his fiancee happened to go with us as well as my other three children. My junior in high school, my freshman in high school and then my now 10 year old daughter so we went to Disney World and the whole time my son Nathan and his at the time fiance. Now wife, which is super fun that they got married this summer, but at the time when they were engaged. Nathan and Lexi were just dying the entire time to have some Dr. Pepper. And everywhere they went all over the Disney property. And everywhere we were that entire trip. They said hey, do you have Dr Pepper? Well come to find out I don’t know if you knew this, but Disney must have some kind of a deal with coke because we never could find Dr. Pepper. Every place we go to every pretzels Stan every churro stand in all of Disney World at all of the parks. They’d say do you have Dr Pepper? And they would say I’m so sorry but we have Mr. Pibb

4:39 and so my son and his fiancee who are so used to getting their regular Dr. Pepper at so delicious and Provo couldn’t get any Dr. Pepper. Well, all of that time, they would say no. I don’t want Mr. Pip. No thank you. Mr. Pibb probably isn’t gonna work. And so the whole time they went just craving Dr. Pepper craving Dr. Pepper until the very last day, we were there. We went to a restaurant down at Downtown Disney. Well, what happened was the usual, the server came out. And Nathan and Lexi said, Hey, do you have Dr. Pepper? And she said, No, I’m so sorry. We don’t have Dr. Pepper. But we have Mr. Pibb. And at this point, they were so wanting anything even closely resembling the Dr. Pepper that they were like, alright, we’ll give it a try. Well, a few minutes later, the server brings out a watered down with condensation on the glass version. The syrup was a little bit off of a Mr. Pip. They took one drink, Nathan and Lexi. And they were like, oh, no, no, thank you. That is not going to work. I do not want this Mr. Pibb. So they ended up just drinking water or Sprite or whatever else. And so they were in this kind of place where they were really wanting Dr. Pepper but couldn’t find it. And then they had this other experience where they sort of tried the Mr. Pin, but it didn’t work out either. wasn’t what they wanted. They were feeling kind of miserable. Does anyone relate to this? When life feels kind of miserable, like you can’t get what you want. And it feels really challenging to get something that you want. Well, finally, the next day, we were on our way home. We were in the airport. And apparently the airport doesn’t have a deal with coke because there we were at the airport getting ready to eat some lunch. We went to Chipotle to eat lunch. And right next to the Chipotle was a McDonald’s and you wouldn’t believe I’m sure you can already guess what they had at McDonald’s they had Dr. Pepper and so they said Can we please just get Chipotle food and get a Dr Pepper to drink. And my husband and I knowing like, of course had this difficult experience firstworldproblems I know but this experience where they gone without and then they had another version that didn’t feel very good. We were like Absolutely. So they got their Dr. Peppers from the McDonald’s I watched Nathan and Lexie sit down and I had my eye on Lexi. And I will never forget the look on her face. When she drink that Dr. Pepper. I can guarantee you she was feeling joy. That’s the look she had on her face. Now, I want us to consider for a minute if the Dr. Pepper would have tasted as good if they hadn’t gone through what they’d gone through before. If they hadn’t felt the disappointment if they hadn’t felt the lack if they hadn’t felt the frustration if they hadn’t felt the longing if they hadn’t felt the desire that they had felt over the week that we were there would that Dr. Pepper have tasted as good if the first churro cart we went to they said yeah, we have Dr. Pepper. Do you think that Lexi or Nathan would have appreciated it as much? And the answer’s no. Right. It was the lack it was all the negative emotion that they felt in the leading up to the actual getting of the Dr. Pepper. It was the contrast that created the joy. Now second Nephi 211 reads for it must needs be that there is is an opposition in all things. It’s true as soda you guys to if not so my firstborn in the wilderness righteousness could not be brought to pass neither wickedness, neither holiness nor misery, neither good nor bad.

9:37 So what’s true and we learned this all throughout the scriptures is that we could not know happiness. If we did not no sadness, we could not know holiness, if we did not experience misery from time to time. So where does joy come in? Joy, to me is the embracing of the contrast. Joy is going through a week of wanting Dr. Pepper, not having it trying Mr. Pibb, thinking it wasn’t good enough, being disappointed, frustrated, and then experienced the happiness of finally getting it. joy to me is a surrender. It’s a trust in our Heavenly Father’s plan, knowing that without the bad without the tough without the difficult, the happy wouldn’t even exist. And this is the way I show it to my clients on my little board that I work on. While I’m working with my clients, and I want you to picture this, I have a big Sharpie. And I draw a circle. And I draw a line down the middle. And on one side of the circle, I write sadness. And on the other side of the circle, I write happiness. Now we’re going to experience both of these in this life, it was always part of the plan, that we would experience both that we would experience opposition, we’d experienced the half of the circle that feels good, and the half of the circle, that doesn’t feel so good. Because what’s true, my friends is if we only experienced happiness, we would never grow, we would never progress when things are going awesome. When we’re teaching the number of people that we want to teach on the mission, when we’re dating an amazing girl, when we get the a on the test, when we get that job that we’ve always wanted. And we never if everything always went the way that we wanted, we would never grow because growth doesn’t happen in the happy parts. We feel pretty content and we stay kind of the same. And that’s why opposition has to be part of the plan. So we’ve got this circle, with the line down the middle on one side happiness. On the other side, sadness, and joy, you guys, to me, this is what I think joy is, is we take a big red marker, and we put a heart that encompasses both sides of the circle, a huge heart, around the happiness and the sadness. That’s joy, that’s the acceptance of God’s will. That’s knowing that he’s in charge. That’s knowing that we were gonna come down to this earth and we were gonna mess it all up. It’s knowing that Heavenly Father was like, Okay, let’s let’s, they gotta, they gotta grow, let’s send them down there, they’re gonna mess it all up. And you know what we’re going to do in the meantime, we’re going to provide a savior. So don’t get confused. When you’re on your mission, and you’re just like, I can’t find the joy anymore. It might be true that you’re having a time of sadness on your mission. And I can promise you because there is an opposition and all things that you’ll likely come back around to happiness. But don’t fool yourself into thinking that you’ve lost the joy, or that you can’t experience joy in the sadness. because joy is that big heart around both. It’s a big heart around the contrast. And when you get home from your mission, don’t fool yourself into thinking that you can’t experience the same amount of joy. Because joy is the acceptance of both. It’s the acceptance of like, Man, I’m feeling a little anxious right now. Okay, man, I’m feeling pretty happy right now. Okay, man, I’m feeling kind of sad. Or maybe I’m feeling some social anxiety or maybe I’m feeling insecure, and all of it is part of the plan. All of it.

14:39 That’s why that big heart encompasses both sides of the circle. It includes happiness and sadness. I love the plan. I know that when I’m willing to feel that negative emotion that’s when I grow The most. And Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ in the end, just made it all okay. Just like in the story I told you, the Dr. Pepper would not have tasted as good. He wouldn’t, unless there had been some lack before. And we see this over and over and over in the scriptures, to the amount of discouragement and despair that we feel the amount of joy, the amount of happiness and contentment and peace that we feel, and that’s available to us is equal to that happened with Joseph Smith, even in Liberty jail, he was at the depths of despair. It was pretty bad in Liberty jail. But in Doctrine and Covenants we read this revelation that if you endure it well, God shall exalt the unhei. Sadness, and happiness. This life, the happiness and sadness is the only way to become like our Savior, and like our Heavenly Father, to experience this life, the good and the bad, the misery and the holiness, the sad and the happiness is the only way. And what I think joy is, is yes, to all of it. We sometimes get caught up thinking that joy is happiness, it’s not joy is a surrender. It’s a trust. It’s a love. It’s a gratitude for this earthly experience, the highs, the lows, the happiness, the sadness, and everything in between knowing that it’s all working for her good. So I hope that this helps you. I hope this idea of joy helps you picture that big heart that encompasses both happiness, and sadness. It’s an amazing plan. Heavenly Father knew what he was doing. And he’s got us the atonements goddess, Jesus Christ has got us. He’s got our back. Saying yes to all of it. The good days and the bad days, it’s okay. It’s okay. If you have bad days. It’s okay. If you don’t feel that good about yourself. It’s okay. That it’s challenging. Sometimes that was always part of it. Just say yes. Say I’m in. I trust, I believe I love. That is where the joy comes. is saying yes. To all of it. I’m in I’m in on your plan, Heavenly Father. And sometimes it doesn’t feel that good. And that’s okay. When missionaries post, how do you feel joy? What I kind of want to say is, you know, I had a lot of ups and downs today. I felt kind of discouraged at this point. And I felt kind of anxious at this point. And I’d had some highs too. But I experienced joy through all of it. Because I know it’s all for me. I know it’s all working for my good. That’s joy, you guys. Knowing that good and bad, sad. Unhappy is all fine. It’s the most amazing plan. So good. All right, everyone have the most amazing week. We will talk to you again soon. Thank you so much for listening to the podcast today. If you want to learn more about what I do, you can go to Jennie dildine.com. Or just come hang out with me on Instagram at Jennie dot the LDS mission coach and Jennie is spelled with an IE. Remember, no matter which part of the mission experience that you’re involved in, just know that Jennie the LDS mission coach is thinking about you every single day.

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Hey! I'm Jennie - The LDS Mission Coach.

Preparing for, serving and coming home from an LDS Mission can present countless changes and transitions. I’ve seen these changes put missionaries at the mercy of their emotions and questioning their abilities. With the tools I teach, young adults empower themselves to navigate every moment of the mission experience with epic, unwavering confidence.

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