143. How to Create Your Own Luck

Episode 143 – How to Create Your Own Luck

In this episode, I discuss how shifting your mindset can help you create your own luck. I talk about how our thoughts and beliefs influence our perception of luck, for better or for worse.

Some key strategies I explore include visualizing your future self who has already achieved their goals, and bringing that positive feeling to the present. I also discuss the importance of taking inspired action while also embracing unexpected outcomes.

Through personal stories, I illustrate how challenging limiting beliefs and embracing new perspectives can open up opportunities for growth. My hope is that listeners walk away feeling empowered to overcome worries and doubts, and to achieve their goals through positive thinking and a growth mindset.

If you found this episode helpful, I want to invite you to subscribe if you aren’t already, share this episode with your friends and write a review. I know this work will help missionaries around the world and it would mean so much to me if you did. Until next week my friends.

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0:00 Hey, what’s up everyone, it is Jennie Dildine, the LDS mission coach and you are listening to the LDS mission Podcast, episode number 143. How to create your own luck. I’m Jennie the LDS mission coach. And whether you’re preparing to serve a mission, currently serving a returned missionary or a missionary mama like me, I created this podcast just for you. Are you searching for epic confidence? Ready to love yourself and to learn the how of doing hard things? Then let’s go. I will help you step powerfully into your potential and never question your purpose. Again. It’s time to embrace yourself. Embrace your mission. Embrace your life, and embrace what’s next.

0:54 Hey, everybody, welcome to the podcast. Happy Friday to you. I hope you’re doing well. We’re headed into weekend of St. Patrick’s Day, I love kind of the spring time of year where everything feels a little bit fun, and new and magical. This is the time of year where we, you know, think about leprechauns and rainbows and glitter and rainbows, all of that fun stuff. And I recently got asked to serve in the nursery of my ward. And I’m totally planning on doing some kind of a St. Patrick’s Day. Craft in there with them. I think that will be really fun. I feel like today have a little bit of a frog in my throat. So I don’t know it’s a little bit scratchy for some reason I haven’t. Well, first of all, I did go to my choir rehearsal last night. I’ve mentioned it here before, but I belong to the millennial choirs and orchestras. And I seen with them and I volunteer with the kids. And I usually come away from those rehearsals, quite vocal, fatigued. Plus, you know, I think there’s just my daughter was sick last week. And I think there’s just stuff in the air. So bear with me, if I do sound a little bit like raspy. More than normal at least, I wanted to share a couple of things with you.

2:24 First of all, I My birthday is coming up. And around my birthday, I usually like to do some kind of a giveaway, just to like celebrate. And to thank you guys for being here and things like that. And so one of the things that I would like to do is I would like to run a special starting today. So today’s March 15. I would like to start a special today for mission prep plus. And I would like to because you guys are all my friends and I am happy you’re here. And I love spending time with you. I would love to give you a little bit of an offer to bring a friend to Michigan prep plus in April or May. So what we’re going to do is we’re going to have, if you buy one Michigan prep plus, then you will be able to get another one half off. And I’m super excited about that. Because you know, sometimes it does feel a little bit better to do something with a buddy. And so that’s what we’re going to do. So starting March 15 until April 15. At midnight, if you buy one mission prep Plus, you can get another one half off. The way that that will probably work best is if you both sign up, and then you can just email me Jennie at Jennie dildine.com, and say, Hey, we signed up together and then I’ll make sure to that you can get that discount, and a little bit of money refunded back to you. So that is super fun. Um, yeah, so we’re gonna run that all the way through my birthday, which is April 1, and then tax day the 15th. And that is when we will be done with that extra little bonus for Michigan prep. Plus, I have an entire podcast episode about Michigan prep. Plus, if you’re curious about it, we’ve been running it. It’s super amazing. And I wish more people knew about it. In fact, if you feel like you would like to help with getting the word out about sort of these mental and emotional tools for missionaries, before they leave and when they come home, just even share this podcast with someone that you know, I would appreciate it so much. They just really I got an email actually this week from a woman I was kind of emailing about Michigan prep plus. And she basically said how she so wished that this sort of thing existed. for her son went on his mission because he’s coming home now. And she knows that he’s going to need some sort of like help or guidance or counseling after he gets home. And I just said to her, I like I know, I’ve, I’ve seen it over and over. And it could be so different for missionaries, and for friends that are leaving on their missions, if they just had some tools and strategies to figure out how to be kind to yourself, even when you’re having a bad day to figure out, what do you do with a difficult companion? To figure out? What do you do when you fail and you don’t reach your goals and all of that kind of thing? It’s It’s mind boggling how much just having a few of those tools in your back pocket on the mission can completely change your mission experience. And so I’m excited about that, buy one, get one half off, I’m so let me know, if you hop in there. Sign up, all the details are on my website, or just email me too, if you have any questions.

6:02 Okay. Let’s jump into what we want to talk about today, which is how to create your own luck. Luck, I tend to see it as something that we believe that we have, or we don’t have, sort of like I was thinking about, I have a sister that every time we went to the mall, as we were growing up, and my dad was in the car, if she was in the car, if my sister was in the car, my dad was driving, there was always a magical, really close parking spot. And my dad would be like, Oh, you’re the lucky, you know, the lucky token or whatever for us to get this close parking spot. And I tend to think of it like this, like, either I’m lucky or I don’t, or I’m not lucky. Or if we think about, like, I have a lucky streak of things where things are going well for us, or are not lucky streak, or things are not going well for us. But if we want to start to learn how to create our own luck, we’ve got to think about like, what is luck, specifically? And how does it work in our brains? Okay, you guys know, we’re always going to probably come back to talking about our thoughts and our feelings. I want to talk to you about your thoughts. And

7:27 I’ve mentioned this on the podcast before. But there’s this amazing thing with your brain. It’s called confirmation bias that Whatever you’re believing, your brain is going to work to prove true, it’s going to make it true in your life. And so if you have a thought like, and you’re on the mission, and you have a thought, like we just haven’t had any luck finding people guess what your brain will tell you, like will make true in your life is you will have a really hard time finding people. Or if you have a thought, like we just weren’t lucky enough to meet our goal. Guess what will happen is that your brain will find all of the reasons that you aren’t lucky enough to meet your goal. And that you probably will have a harder time meeting your goal. If you have this thought, like, my roommate, or my friend always has all the luck when it comes to guys and dating, or whatever, right? Is that when we think she has the luck, and I don’t, our brains will go to work proving that true. So any date that we’re on, basically, our brains are gonna be like, see, this didn’t work, I’m not lucky. Picture it kind of like a filing cabinet is that if you have a thought that you believe, like, I’m just not lucky when it comes to parking spots, your brain will have a filing cabinet that it starts to fill all of evidence and proof that that is true. So every time I go to the mall, and I don’t get a parking spot that I want, then my brain is like Yep, see. And here’s the thing that’s so crazy about this is even the ideas or the thoughts or the beliefs that we have that don’t feel good when we think them our brain will still go to work proving those things true. Even if we don’t feel good when we think it so remember this thing your brain wants to be right more than it wants you to feel good.

9:40 So eventually picture it like we get evidence and more evidence that our roommate is you know, as always has the most awesome guys that are reaching out to her and we just never get asked out or the district next to us is always meeting their goals and we never meet our goals and we just aren’t good at talking to people on the street, right? Whatever we believe, our brain will start to fill a hole, not just a filing cabinet full of evidence to prove that true. But think of like rooms and rooms and rooms of evidence. Now some of these thoughts become sort of beliefs over time, because it, the room is so full of evidence that it just feels true to our brain. It’s almost like by this point, when it just feels true. We put on glasses, right? That things don’t just work, things don’t work out for me. Or I’m not I’m not good at talking to people, or I never meet my goals, or I never follow through, or other people get all the luck, right? So we just put on these glasses. And what’s crazy is, even if that’s not true, those thoughts, were unable to see other possibilities, because now we’re wearing the glasses of that thought or that belief.

11:11 So one thing that I was thinking about is, I’ve talked about before on here about how I have a son with special needs, who’s on the autism spectrum. He’s down living in Orem, and he’s doing great, he graduated last year. But when he was graduated from high school last year, but when he was young things were really tough. And I felt like I was sort of always either in some sort of like, confrontation with him because he was highly emotional. Or if I was just like, had to shut down so I could sort of like function and get through things. And so I remember being with one of my friends, and I just said, it’s so hard to have a kid on the autism spectrum. And let’s just say first and foremost, of course, let’s always go ahead and validate ourselves by saying, yeah, that is hard. It is hard, whatever you’re going through, if you’re not meeting your goals, if you’re, if your dating, life is not going well, if you’re not getting the number of baptisms that you were hoping for. Let’s just say that is hard. But something happened when I was on a girls trip with this friend, and she just said to me, but what if it isn’t hard? And she didn’t say it into like condescending way, like, Are you crazy, you shouldn’t think about it that way. Like, she just offered me this other way of thinking about it. What she did in that moment, is she allowed me to take off my glasses, that filing cabinet full of evidence that I created for myself, that being the mom of this child was hard. And it only took me a second like to take those glasses off and be like, Oh my gosh, what if she’s right. And it was just that little bit of a shift that did allow me to start to surrender to the process that I was in and find strength and find other ways to make it easier on me. And to make it easier on my son.

13:24 Okay, maybe you feel this way about your mission. I was working with a client once who basically like he was on the mission. And every time we talk he, I’d be like, well, we could try this or we could try this. And he’d be like, Yeah, but it’s just hard to do. And totally, of course, it is hard to do. It’s hard to think about it that way. It’s hard to go through those things. It’s hard to have your mission president sort of not include you or it’s hard to have, I don’t know to not be seen by your companion or whatever all of that stuff is hard. So that’s what I was saying. But what happens is when we just believe my mission is hard, or like having this companion is hard. We never take off those glasses. And we start building those that filing cabinet full of evidence to to prove that thought true. And what’s crazy is if we could just take those glasses down just for a second and be like, huh, I might be wrong. Then we would see something else. And we would see the other possibility. And we would see perhaps what is available for us to think instead. I have this other example of where I was the lead in my high school musical. And it was called The Fantasticks. Maybe none of you have really heard of it, but it was a very small cast. I was the lead and During this one scene, Louisa is the character, she kind of goes from the comfort of her own home to kind of go see the world and explore the world. And everything that is going on around her are outside of her little bubble, basically. And as she goes and does this, there’s this guy that’s there, that’s her guide. And he gives her this mask. And so I had this really pretty like, picture like Mardi Gras kind of mask that was on a stick, and I would hold it in front of my face that character, if she held the mask in front of her face, she could see all of the good stuff and all of the beautiful things about the world that she was sort of exploring. And when she would take that mask down, she would see all of the yucky stuff, and then not as amazing things about the world that she was exploring. And so we almost become when we have these beliefs about how lucky we are or how privileged we are, or how or how privileged we’re not, or how everything works out. For other people. It’s basically like having that mask on. And in this case, when she had the mask on, she saw the positive, but you might have some thoughts in there that are not serving you, because they just keep you in that spot. It’s all your brain can see.

16:26 I don’t know if you can think of any examples in your life where it’s just like, maybe you you go to your district meetings, and you have this belief, like no one here listens to me, right? And then everything everyone says, or every little thing that everyone does, or every side glance or every interaction that you have with people, you’re like, see, no one listens to me. See, no one cares about my ideas. Do you see what I mean? And so that are like, let’s say you have this belief that your friend group doesn’t, isn’t going to including you. If we believe that, and that’s the glasses that we have on your brain will go to work to prove that true. And every single light hangout that you’re on or group date that you’re on, or whatever dance you go to your brain will make that true. And I don’t know if this sounds familiar, but you’re like, see, yep, I was right. They they don’t include me the way I want to be included. Okay, I hope this is making sense to you. So instead of just being blinded by this belief that we’ve had, like, I’m not lucky, nothing works out for me. We just open ourselves up to what else could be true. And here’s the thing that’s so fun is when we do that, almost anything else is possible. We get out of the way that we’ve been thinking about something for such a long time. And just like with my son, I was like, Wait a second, what if this could be easy. And that just opened up a whole new world for me.

18:06 So let’s talk about just before I let you go, just a few tips to have in your back pocket to create your own luck. And these would maybe be kind of the steps that you would want to take if you want to see more magic and more luck and more kind of sparkle in your life or excitement in your life. Okay. So number one is believe that you have it. So instead of being like, ah never works out for me, I’m never lucky in that regard. Believe that you are. That’s the first step because as soon as you believe that you are lucky, and that things work out for you. And things work out for you better than you could even imagine. That’s the kind of glasses you’ll put on. And that’s what you’ll start seeing and your brain will start compiling a whole room of evidence about that. My own son, the one that I’ve been talking about a little bit on this podcast, the one with special needs that’s on the autism spectrum. I really do do believe that he’s magical, because it’s just amazing to me how things just work out for him. And I actually believe that he believes that things are just gonna work out for him. And they always do. Like he’s the least likely person probably if you were to just like look at him and see kind of the hardships he’s been up against. To think that he would be as successful as he has been. But in high school, they’re marching band to, like first in the entire competition for the district. There. He won his hockey. His hockey tournament for the year. I probably won’t say it the right way but the one that he had a girlfriend he was living his best life he got into the school that he wanted to get into and I just think whatever he touches, turns to gold is magic. And I again think he kind of believes that too. And so that is what actually ends up happening in his life. So number one is believed that you have it, or believe that you are lucky believe that you know how to make things happen. decide that what you want in the future is for sure happening. I love this one so much. Because let’s say you want to run a marathon, let’s say you are interested in getting married, let’s say you want to serve a mission. Maybe you haven’t left yet. Maybe you want to be a theater major, I don’t know, maybe you want to be a piano performance major. Maybe you want to cure cancer or whatever. Whatever you decide to do, decide that it’s for sure happening. Like the way I think about myself and my future. I’m like, imagine her and what she is going to be like, like, what is that version of Jenny going to be like? Picture that for yourself? Maybe if you’re on your mission? What is the version of you that’s already home thinking and feeling? And what are they doing? Like, for sure, I’m going to feel fulfilled and happy and content and proud of myself and grateful when I get home from my mission. So think of that future person, it can be in three months, or three years after you’ve already accomplished the thing. So after you’ve already run the marathon, and then ask yourself, how does that version of me think and feel? Now the magic is, the luck is creating a space right now, where you think and feel those emotions now. So if you suspect that once you’re married, you’re going to feel content and happy. Because you’re thinking I’m living my best life. The magic is you create your own luck when you bring that thought and feeling to the present moment, and you’re dating. And instead of being like, you know, this is never gonna work out. You just decide, I’m living my best life right now. And you create that contentment and peace and happiness now, see what I mean? That’s the magic is pull the thought and feeling from the future, and bring it to the now. And even if it’s hard to believe it sometimes, you’re like, Ah, that was the hardest workout I’ve ever had. I don’t know if I’ll ever be run, be able to run a marathon. You go, no, actually, future means already run a marathon, which I never want to do, by the way. But if that’s you go to the future views version of you that’s already done the thing and say to yourself, how am I going to think and feel, and maybe you’re going to be feeling proud or accomplished. Okay, because you’re thinking, I’m pretty amazing. And I did, I’m doing an amazing thing. Bring that thought and feeling to the future, or to the present moment, and think that now, even on the days when it was a hard run, like I’m amazing, I’m doing something amazing. And feel that fulfillment now, that’s the magic. Okay, third thing, be can’t become an agent to make stuff happen. And what I mean by this is, I think a lot of times we feel like it has to just sort of come to us, like or the things that we want to have happen. Like, maybe you’ve always wanted to create an Instagram account where you can inspire people, or maybe you’ve always wanted to create journals for sister missionaries or something like that. Or maybe you’ve always wanted to graduate in a chemistry degree so that you could do something amazing with that. Sometimes I think we get a little bit stuck, because we think it’s not possible. And so we just don’t take any action, we just think that’ll never be me. But if we’ve already taken these steps, first of all, believe that you can have it. Second of all, tap into your future thought and feeling. Then third, that feeling that you’re feeling right now is going to drive some action. And it’s going to, it’s going to get you on the path to where you want to go.

24:15 I’ve been thinking this week about what’s the difference between making something happen, and just being open to like God’s plan, the luck, the magic, the spirit, all of that good stuff. And I had someone tell me this equation, which I thought was really fun, which is like there’s some stuff that we have control and influence over right, like I, I totally could have recorded this podcast or I didn’t have to write, but there’s also me marketing this podcast, which is something that I can do, but I also can’t go into your home and put the earbuds into your ear. So same with like if you’re teaching someone on the mission You can set the goals, you can get out there and you can meet people, you can invite people, and you can do all of that thing. But we don’t have ultimate control over what they decide to do in the end, the person that you’re talking to. So I was sort of talking about this on a group call, and someone messaged me after and said, Why don’t you think about it this way. Because what I had said to her, I’m kind of going all over the place. But hopefully you’re following me is like what I had said to her as I was like, I want a plus b to equal c. And I said, so I can just know for certain that something’s going to happen. But that’s not really how life works, especially when we’re involved with other people and their ideas and their, and the situations we’re in. And if we want to talk about luck, like and the spirit and sort of magic and how that comes into it. And she said something like, maybe you want to think about it, like a plus b plus x equals c. And sometimes she said the X, like, it’s kind of fun to think about it, because that’s like the X Factor, right? That’s the luck, or that’s the openness, or that’s the spirit or that’s the magic, right, that happens. Sometimes, those things that are out of our power are going to work in our favor. And sometimes they’re not going to work in our favor, right? Like, I don’t know, like, my business was a little bit slower during the holidays, right? So I, sometimes that x is going to like 10 XS, and sometimes it’s going to give us a result, that’s a little bit less than what we were hoping for. But that’s totally okay. Because the agent, we’re in charge of a plus b. And then just know, there’s always a plus X. And I highly recommend that we just believe the plus X, the X Factor is always working in our favor. And then that is what’s going to give us the result or that outcome that you’re after. Right. So if we’re running a marathon, it’s like, I’m gonna train, I’m gonna do eat the way that this eating plan has told me, I’m gonna get some help from a trainer, right, that’s your A plus B. And then there’s a plus X, which is sometimes gonna be like, Oh, it’s all gonna work out magically good. And the sun’s gonna be shining the day I run my marathon, and I’m gonna have a lot of energy. And then the plus x is sometimes like, oh, actually, I have the flu, I can’t run. But either way, become an agent to make stuff happen. Your life is yours. And you get to create whatever you want, and then be open to the luck and the magic. And then the fourth thing is, look for all the ways that you are truly lucky that things always work in your favor. You’ll start thinking about it that way, and then you’ll start seeing it that way. And then those results will start showing up in your life. You guys, if we really think about it, we all are magical. I mean, it’s kind of mind blowing. I think that our heavenly parents, I love this song. And I know I’ve talked about it on this podcast before. But the primary song that is my Heavenly Father loves me. He says he gave me my life, my mind my heart, I thank him reverently. And think about how crazy it is, and how lucky it is and how magical it is that I can create something in my mind and then feel feelings. And then through my agency and actions, I can create an actual thing that exists in the world. I was thinking about this time last year is about when I started to put together Michigan prep plus. And it was not even a thing that even existed in the world. There’s I don’t think anyone doing this mental and emotional preparation for missionaries. And or maybe they are but like on a smaller just like in our ward, or you know your ward mission prep. But even when I’ve attended mission preps, it’s much more about teaching and how to feel the spirit and things like that, then what are the actual strategies you need to feel your best self when you’re out there? Anyway, I started thinking about how I wanted to get this out to more missionaries at a bigger scale because there’s so many missionaries, and it existed in my mind. And then I felt this passion and this desire to make it happen. And then I started putting the pieces together. And I started creating a resource manual. And I started hiring coaches and I started hiring returned missionaries to work in that program so that they could help me. And, to me, I created my own luck, I created my own magic. And it’s just magic at all that I am so honored and grateful that I get to do this work at all, that I have a mind that works and a heart that feels things and feels things deeply and then the agency or the ability to act in my own life. So think that for you to look for the ways you are truly lucky, and truly magic you are magic to. Okay.

30:50 So I hope this has been kind of a fun episode for you to listen to. Let me go over it again, real quick, believe that you have it the luck or that you have the capability, or the magic, decide what you want in the future. And then bring that thought and feeling from future you to present, become an agent and actually start making stuff happen, you have to do the a plus b. And then the plus x is like that X factor that’s not up to you, but just be open to it being amazing. And then number four, look for all the ways you are truly lucky and truly magical. Like even just the mere fact that we get to be on this earth at this time, and be creators, with our minds and our hearts. And with the things that we can do and create in this world. It’s pretty magical. I love it. So okay, you guys, I hope you have the most amazing week. Enjoy your St. Patrick’s Day and we’ll talk to you next time.

31:56 Serving a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints can present a unique set of challenges. And many of those challenges you might not even see coming. So you’re gonna want a unique set of solutions. It’s easier than you think to overcome worry and anxiety serve the successful mission you’ve always dreamed of and navigate your post mission experience with confidence. That is why I created some amazing free goodies that I’m sharing in my show notes. Maybe you want to grab the free training for preparing missionaries might video course for RMS or maybe you and I should hop on a free strategy call. If you’re ready to take your preparedness to serve or your preparedness to come home to the next level. Then go grab one of those freebies. And in the meantime, no matter which part of the mission experience you are involved in. Just know that Jenny, the LDS mission coach is thinking about you every single day.

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Hey! I'm Jennie - The LDS Mission Coach.

Preparing for, serving and coming home from an LDS Mission can present countless changes and transitions. I’ve seen these changes put missionaries at the mercy of their emotions and questioning their abilities. With the tools I teach, young adults empower themselves to navigate every moment of the mission experience with epic, unwavering confidence.

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